The Lamb’s Wedding Feast (Medium-Rare)

This series of posts is my attempt to demonstrate that the language of the Revelation was actually symbolic code that was very intelligible to a first-century Jewish Christian living in the Roman Empire.  I’m re-writing the Revelation to communicate the same message, but to a twenty-first century American Christian audience, using symbols we understand.  This particular section parallels Revelation chapter 19.  If you want to catch up, here’s a PDF of the entire series so far: The Revelation to JR. – Chapters 1-19.

After all that, I heard what sounded like an enormous multitude in Heaven, and together they said,

We pledge allegiance to God!  Salvation and glory and power belong to our God,
Because his judgments are true and just.
He has judged the great whore who corrupted the earth with her adultery,
And he has given her what she deserves for the blood of his servants.

And they cried out once more,

Pledge allegiance to God! She burns forever, and the smoke rises up like a just incense forever.

Then the fifty congresspersons and the four living creatures stood, placed their hands over their hearts and pledged allegiance to God who is seated behind the desk by saying,

This is truth! We pledge allegiance to God!

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Black Swan

Spoiler Alert! If you haven’t seen Black Swan yet, consider yourself warned: there’re lots of spoilery bits ahead in this refraction!

The super-creepy Black-Swan-Nina doesn't make her apperance until the last few minutes of the film, and the wait is WORTH IT! Black Swan is the latest trippy thriller from Darren Aronofsky (The Wrestler, Pi, Requiem for a Dream) and like most of his films, you’re lucky if you know what’s real and what’s not by the end.  What we’re promised in Black Swan is a fairly straightforward offering: young ballerina Nina Sayers (Golden Globe-winning Natalie Portman) wants the lead role in her company’s production of Swan Lake, but her quest to gain – and keep – the role might cost her her sanity, or even her life.  It could easily have been an by-the-numbers sexy-thriller whose only real twist is its setting (that being the gritty, no-holds-barred world of professional ballet).

What we get instead is a profound exploration of the nature of perfection and the complex relationships surrounding innocence and art.

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Lady Liberty’s Funeral

This series of posts is my attempt to demonstrate that the language of the Revelation was actually symbolic code that was very intelligible to a first-century Jewish Christian living in the Roman Empire.  I’m re-writing the Revelation to communicate the same message, but to a twenty-first century American Christian audience, using symbols we understand.  This particular section parallels Revelation chapter 18.  If you want to catch up, here’s a PDF of the entire series so far: The Revelation to JR. – Chapters 1-18.

Then I saw another angel descending from Heaven, wielding incredible authority.  His beauty lit up the whole world.  He cried out,

Fallen, fallen is the Third Reich
It has become a home for demons, haunted by every kind of evil spirit, every disgusting bird and awful creature.
All the world’s nations have drunk the juice of her adultery,
The politicians have committed adultery with her,
And the corporations of the world have gotten wealthy from the power of her luxury.

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Lady Liberty

This series of posts is my attempt to demonstrate that the language of the Revelation was actually symbolic code that was very intelligible to a first-century Jewish Christian living in the Roman Empire.  I’m re-writing the Revelation to communicate the same message, but to a twenty-first century American Christian audience, using symbols we understand.  This particular section parallels Revelation chapter 17.  If you want to catch up, here’s a PDF of the entire series so far: The Revelation to JR. – Chapters 1-17.

Next, one of the seven angels who had the seven bowls came to me and said,

Follow me, and I will show you the judgment of the great whore who looks out over the ocean.  She’s the one with whom all the politicians have committed adultery.  The one with whose juice of adultery the world’s peoples have gotten drunk.

So he carried me away in the spirit to a desert, and I saw a woman sitting on a Beast that was covered with blasphemous names, and it had thirteen heads and fifty dollar signs.  The woman wore a green robe and a crown that looked like a sunburst.  With one hand she held a cup like a torch in the air, and it was full of abominations, of the juice of her adultery.  In the other hand she held a book, on which was written a mysterious name: “The Third Reich, Mother of All Whores and Abominations”.  The woman was clearly drunk on the blood of the saints and witnesses to Jesus.Continue reading

Armageddon

This series of posts is my attempt to demonstrate that the language of the Revelation was actually symbolic code that was very intelligible to a first-century Jewish Christian living in the Roman Empire.  I’m re-writing the Revelation to communicate the same message, but to a twenty-first century American Christian audience, using symbols we understand.  This particular section parallels Revelation chapter 14.  If you want to catch up, here’s a PDF of the entire series so far: The Revelation to JR. – Chapters 1-16.

Next, I saw another awesome sign in heaven: seven angels that had seven plagues (these are the last plagues, because once they’ve been unleashed, God’s wrath will be fulfilled).  I saw what looked like a sea of molten glass, and along its shore, sitting at organs or playing Taylor guitars, stood all the peoples who had conquered the Beast and his image and the number of his title.

They sang the song Moses – God’s slave – wrote, and the Lamb’s song:

Lord God, General of Heaven’s Armies,
What you’ve done is wondrous and amazing!
President of all countries,
Your policies and ways are always just and correct.

Lord, who doesn’t respect and give you your due honor?
Because you alone are holy and righteous.
Every country and people in the world will come and worship you,
Because your judgments have finally been revealed to everyone.

Then I looked and the Temple (which is really the Tabernacle in Heaven) was opened, and out came the seven angels that had the seven final plagues.  They were wearing bright white graduation robes and they had beautiful golden sashes across their chests.  One of the four creatures gave the seven angels seven golden offering plates full of the eternal God’s wrath.  God’s glory was so bright that the Temple seemed to be filled with a smoke or haze, and so powerful that no one could enter until the seven angels’ plagues had finished.

A loud voice from the Temple called out to the seven angels:

Go and pour out onto the Earth the seven offering plates of God’s wrath.

So the first angel poured his bowl onto the Earth, and anyone who had the Beast’s mark or worshiped its image developed a putrid, painful sore.  The second angel poured his bowl into the ocean, and it turned into congealed blood, and everything in the oceans died.  The third angel poured his bowl into the rivers and they turned to blood.  At this, the angel that commands the water said,

Eternal Holy One, you have judged these things and your judgments are just.
They shed the blood of saints and prophets, so you have given them blood to drink.
It’s what they deserve.

And I heard the altar respond,

Yes, Lord God, General of Heaven’s Armies, your judgments are always just and correct!

The fourth angel poured his bowl into the sun, and it was allowed to burn them.  They were burned by the sun’s fierce heat, but they cursed God, who had authority over the plagues.  They didn’t repent or acknowledge God’s supremacy.

The fifth angel poured his bowl on the desk of the Beast, and its nation fell into darkness.  The peoples’ sores were so bad they gnawed their tongues and cursed the God of heaven… but they still didn’t repent.

The sixth angel poured his bowl on the Pacific Ocean, and its waters dried up to prepare the way for the kings from the Orient.  I saw three evil spirits like snakes coming out of the mouths of the Dragon and the Beast and the False Prophet.  These are demons that work miracles and go to the kings, presidents and prime ministers of the whole world to call and assemble their armies for battle on the great Day of God the General of Heaven’s Armies.

Watch! I’m coming like a thief!  The one who says awake, ready and dressed, is blessed.  Don’t go around naked and embarrass yourself!

The demons assembled the world’s powers at the place that in English is called “The Meadows” and in Spanish is “Las Vegas”.

The seventh angel poured his bowl into the air, and a loud voice called out from the Temple,

It is done!

Lightning fell like hail, thunder crashed like jets flying overhead, and an 10.0 earthquake struck – worse than anything anyone’s ever experienced.  The great city split in three and all the great cities of the world fell.  God didn’t forget about Babylon – he made her drink from his cup, the juice of his furious wrath.  Every island sank and every mountain fell.  Huge hailstones the size of Volkswagens fell on people from the sky, and everyone cursed God because the hail plague was so horrible.