Afraid to Ask
This sermon written and delivered by Ashley Bekkerus
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I have a daughter and she’s 2 years old currently. And, if any of you are parents or have known anyone who has had a child, you know that this is a “fun” time. She’s learning to communicate, which is both good and bad. For example, when she first learned the sign for “more,” oh man did that change her world. She would say more to everything, even if it wasn’t possible (like, when we only have one tv and it’s already on). As soon as she learned to talk, she has not been shy about her opinion.
For example, I was off of work for a couple of weeks, which meant I was getting her up and dressed every morning (instead of her dad) and taking her to daycare. Well, when I started work again, that meant her dad started getting her up and dressed again. And the first day he went in there to get her up and dressed, she saw him, went straight to the door, opened it (which we didn’t know she could do at that point), pointed out of it and looked right at her dad and said “get out. Where did mommy go?”
Her ability to state her opinion so unequivocally is a characteristic that I hope she never loses (and also hope she learns to hone a bit more). But I’ve found in my life, and I know a lot of other people who are like this as well, that it’s hard to ask for what I need or want. I’ve found that in so many places in my life; at work, at home, with my friends, and even in my most intimate relationships – with the people I trust the most.
In my life, I’ve found that it’s much easier to people please than it is to ask for anything because I’ve found that in my head, I, myself, am only a burden to people. My baseline assumption in any social situation is that nobody actually wants me around and they’re really just tolerating me, which naturally leads to the conclusion that I should try to make them as happy as possible around me so that they don’t get more tired of me.
It is no surprise that in my relationship with God, asking for things doesn’t even enter my brain space. It doesn’t even occur to me that it is something that I could or should do. And more than that, when I hear people talk about asking God for things, it’s actually a bit revolting to me. I don’t want to treat God like a vending machine and expect God to just give me things. With that line of thinking, I’m actually the good guy in this situation. I’m doing God a favor. Saving God some time. “You don’t have to worry about me, God. Go answer all those other people’s needs. I’ve got it over here.”
I firmly believe that I’m not the only one who feels or acts this way. And we’re going to talk about that today. Because, what if our not asking is actually a sinful act?
What if keeping things from God (because that’s what we’re doing) is hindering our relationship with God and our relationship with others?
Join us Sunday as we explore what it looks like to make bold requests of the God who loves us.