JR. Forasteros - October 29, 2017

Sitting with Grief

Good Grief

Grief is uncomfortable. In the face of tragedy, no words are sufficient to salve our pain. Yet in the face of others’ pain, we find ourselves offering platitudes and speaking for God so we can avoid their pain. But Lamentations 1 is a funeral dirge. We hear the woman’s honest, unflinching cries of pain and see the prophet join her, offering nothing but his presence. How can we learn to be honest about pain so we can begin the process of reorientation?

From Series: "Good Grief"

We avoid pain and grief as much as possible. When faced with someone else's grief, we avoid or offer platitudes. But the book of Lamentations invites us to sit with grief, to enter into the prophetic process of Lament. In this series, we'll explore how to grieve and how to be a friend to the grieving. Ultimately, we'll see how the process of lament invites us to be agents of healing in the larger world.

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I have a number of friends who say they don’t believe in God or are waiting to be convinced of the existence of God.  Many of these self-identified  atheists or agnostics, grew up in churches. When they share their spiritual journeys with me, I hear the same story again and again.  When they reached the  point where they took their faith seriously enough to begin looking for truth, to study and ask questions, they were told to stop. They were told to JUST  believe!

This has created a rather ironic problem for many of them — they are no longer Christ seekers, they no longer believe in God because the Church insisted, demanded they believe.  And not just believe, but believe without questioning!   

The Church emphasizes believing the “right” things.

Ask most people what it means to be a Christian and you’ll typically get some version of “believe Jesus died for your sins.” If you ask them for more (or to elaborate) you might get things like “believe in the Trinity” or “believe in the Virgin Birth” or “believe in the Second Coming.”  But isn’t there more to it?  What about doing the right things.

We know Christians are supposed to be loving and peacemaking and kind and generous but those don’t make us Christian. Lots of people are loving and kind and they’re not Christian.

So we tend to focus on beliefs. But, as many of my atheist and agnostic friends can attest, in fact, as many of my Christian friends can attest, we can focus so much on belief that it becomes all that matters. We’ve all met Christians who believe all the right things but are pretty terrible people. People who can check all the right belief boxes but are selfish, cruel or uncaring.

There’s a middle ground. Belief matters. It really does. But beliefs that don’t transform us, change us to be more like Jesus (or better reflect God’s image) aren’t good for us – the Bible actually calls them worthless. Today, we’ll see that beliefs only matter when they shape our behaviors.

Belief only matters when it makes a difference in how we live. Belief only matters when you can see it.

Join us Sunday as we learn how belief makes a difference in our daily lives.

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